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The world's first interactive, personalized,
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 Fun poetry and punOETRY™ from Jeff's books
 Incredible School Assemblies

 
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From the silliest silliness to simple fun
you're sure to find yourself enjoying
Jeff Nathan's poems and PunOETRY™


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Shoe Pain
from the book There's a Bear in My Shoe

      The shoes I bought don’t fit me—they were perfect at the store—
      But since I brought them home they just don’t feel good anymore.

      I thought the sole annoyance was the problem in the sole.
      My heel that wouldn’t heal though, soon began to take its toll.

      It then seemed my archenemy, the arch, caused all my woes,
      But that did not explain the pain I felt along my toes.

      Perhaps these giant letters make my shoes not fit too well:
      My left shoe has an R inside; my right shoe has an L.


The Twister Tournament

      Competing through the day against his sister,
      Poor Mr. Pfister battled hard in Twister.
      He played so long he got a giant blister,
      Which he thought he could use
      To bump her so she'd lose,
      But Mr. Pfister's Twister blister missed her.

Little League
from the book There's a Bear in My Shoe 

      Now, I’ve been coaching baseball
      For lots of seasons here,
      But I have not been challenged
      The way I've been this year.

      Most teams have got some talent,
      But this group sure is odd.
      I’m not sure why they gave me
      Two frogs on this year’s squad.

      Oh, where am I to put them?
      Is this some kind of joke?
      I sure can’t make them pitchers.
      Their moms and dads would croak!

      I might just have the answer
      To where I’ll put these guys.
      I’ll use them in the outfield –
      They’re good at catching flies.

The Long Car Ride
from the book There's a Bear in My Shoe

      Please tell me – are we almost there?
      These awful car rides just aren’t fair.
      The heat is getting to my head.
      If we’re not there soon, I’ll be dead.

      So aren’t we there? Please tell me, Dad,
      ‘Cause now my stomach’s feeling bad.
      This ride has got me so upset.
      Why can’t we leave the driveway yet?


 

See more poems at www.jeffnathanpoems.com/PunOETRY.html

 

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